The Club's First Hat Day

photo: L->R, stephan, marion, susan, doug, catharine, jason

A true 'group' photo - another 'first' for your club.

Besides This - Nothing Remarkable

Paris:- Thursday, 25. May 2000:- The weather is unremarkable so I won't make any remarks about it other than to say I'd rather go to today's club meeting than stay home with my winter jacket on.

Paris' armored cars are in service again so I won't remark about the lack of cash either. The 'bikini wars were on last week's posters all around Paris, and this week's are unremarkable except for the new ones for Aubade's underwear, which make the 'bikini wars' highly forgettable.

I get halfway to the métro before remembering I've left my tickets at home, but my faulty memory is unremarkable too. The métro does nothing remarkable on the ride to Châtelet and when I get out of it, the Rue de Rivoli looks like it always does when it looks normal.

One of the 'Fiat 500s of the Week' from several weeks ago is illegally parked in the same place as last time, but now has parking tickets on it - but this is more inevitable than remarkable.

Across from the Louvre, there is another Fiat 500, but I think it got the 'Fiat 500 of the Week' awardphoto: catharine, soup of the week before. With today's two photos of them, I think they will become the 'Fiat 500s of the Week II' in Monday's issue of Metropole.

In La Corona, as soon as the civilians clear out of the club's area of the café I move new members Catharine Saxberg and Jason Hraynyk from the Siberia they're in to the club's luxurious portion.

Then I put the date of 24. May in both the member's and the club 'reports' booklets, and add 'Queen Victoria's Birthday' to the 'reports' booklet.

Even if it is not 'Food of the Week,' Catharine's soup has everything.

Catharine is in the 'VMRR' category. All readers and 'VMs' who remember what this means, raise your hands. 'RMs' are here, so I don't have to explain the initials, obviously. Well, not exactly 'here,' but they'll be here soon.

Jason Hraynyk is none of the club's new initials designating various states of membership, because he is not a reader of Metropole, but another one of these innocents who have been shanghaied into coming to a meeting.

The first thing I want to know from Catharine is what it is she does with Radiocabs in Toronto. Ha, ha, what a joke! It is not 'Radiocabs' but 'Radio Broadcast Sales.' I am the 'Nitwit of the Week.' The patient Catharine has been waiting a long time for this revenge.

Jason was in Paris on holiday recently and when he returned to Canada, he found that he was fired. He came back to Paris because it is more amusing to be unemployed here than in Oshawa - which is so close to Toronto that nobody knows were it is.

This is fine for 'City of the Week.' After a little mapwork - in the member's booklet again! - it becomes clearphoto: perrier of the week that Oshawa is nowhere near Duluth, Thunder Bay or SS-Marie. I secretly think it is closer to Detroit, but Catharine and Jason assure me this is Windsor.

Obviously members are pacing themselves at La Corona. No 'Drink of the Week' for Perrier!

Of course all this thinking makes these two new Charter members extremely hungry. Monsieur Ferrat assures Catharine that the menu's 'Choc-Soupe Gratinée' is tomato, onions or - not 'and' but 'or' - légumes. Catharine asks for légumes. I ask Monsieur Ferrat if it is possible to have everything in the soup all at once, sort of like a four-seasons pizza and he says yes.

This is how Catharine ends up with everything instead of just plain old légumes. Jason has a typical ham and cheese sandwich, which includes half of a tasty-looking baguette.

The latest news from Canada concerns hockey of course - what else do Canadians ever talk about? Hockey is now permitted to have up to seven and a half periods; no doubt in an effort to match the day-long lacrosse games played by the locals before any Europeans showed up there.

I spot a Zorro hat in the distance and it turns out to be Charter member Marion Nowak returning foranother visit. Susan and Doug Fuss arrive with their Savannah, Georgia suntans and then I see another! 'Zorro' Hat! in the distance.

Continued on page 2...
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