"Down, Way Down, Way Way Down"

toon: do you see any rabbits

Questions and Answers of the Week

Paris:- Friday, 7. December 2001:- Some regular readers of Metropole know that the information on the 'About Metropole' page says that I will reply to all emails, "almost immediately."

I did manage to more or less do this for many years. Then 'almost immediately' became answering most emails mainly on Tuesdays, which is also my 'official' weekend. The few that would be left over, I would try to clear up by Saturday.

There still are certain emails that do get immediate replies - such as the ones from students who need instant answers for homework due on Mondays. 'Lost' readers trying to find the Café Metropole Club's meeting place in Paris get fast replies too, if they haven't already left Tasmania.

And there are other, certain emails, that might not get immediate and correct answers, simply because I don't know the answers and can't figure out how to get them. But, even to these, I try to write and at least say, 'I don't know.'

Meanwhile I 'file' the question in my head, and hope it pops up again if I ever accidently find myself in the right place at the right time to get an answer. On the face of it this is a less than foolproof way of satisfying readers' quest for knowledge, but some times it actually works.

This should explain why today's email exchange deals with the following -

"What's Happened to the Rabbits At Roissy?"

Email from Sharon and Elliott Medrich. Sent via the Internet on Tuesday, 30. October:-

Hi Ric:

Sharon and I will be coming to France again this Xmas - we are from Oakland, California, the 'City of the Week' last Xmas.

You probably don't remember that we posed the real, and ever so pressing question - "What's happened to the rabbits at Roissy?" Since you didn't even seem to know that there were once about a billion rabbits living in close proximity to the arriving and departing 747s, etc., it probably did not seem like much of a question at all to you.

But we still want to know - what did happen to the rabbits? Hoping that all your newsy connections can find out, we pose it again.

See you before long.

Sharon and Elliott Medrich


Eaten By Foxes?

Bonjour Sharon & Elliott -

Paris, Tuesday, 13. November:- Thanks for the reminder about your question concerning Roissy's rabbits. Apologies for reminding me to answer a question immediately aren't necessary.

But remember - Oakland isn't going to get the 'City of the Week' award again - nor is any other place that already has it, unless I forget.

You are incorrect when you suggest I've forgotten your original question and your recenttoon: rabbit gilding easter eggs reminder. It is simply that your have posed one of those questions that prevent me from replying to other emails like yours.

Where the rabbits really are - at home gilding Easter eggs for next Easter.

As you quite rightly point out, 'Where have Roissy's rabbits gone?' is a question of major importance. The problem is that if the rabbits aren't there anymore, everybody is probably glad to be rid of them - and hardly give a damn where they've ended up. They've possibly been eaten by Roissy's foxes.

With all the nervousness in the skies these days, I hardly dare to phone up Aéroports de Paris to ask what they've done with their blasted rabbits. But, hmmm, I think their office is near here someplace - somewhere just around the proverbial corner.

However, your re-posing of the question has definitely refreshed it in my memory. This doesn't necessarily mean you'll be getting an answer from me soon, but do not abandon all hope.

regards, ric


Better Late Than Never?

Bonjour Sharon & Elliott -

Paris, Wednesday, 5. December:- To recap - at the end of October, as Metropole readers and Café Metropole Club members in good standing - you wanted to know what happened to Roissy's rabbits.

Your question was, in a nutshell, "What's happened to the rabbits at Roissy?"

You already know I did absolutely nothing for two weeks about this vital question before I replied, "'Where Have Roissy's Rabbits Gone?' is a question of major importance. The problem is that if the rabbits aren't there anymore, everybody is probably glad to be rid of them - and hardly give a hoot where they've ended up. Possibly been eaten by Roissy's foxes." Etc., etc.

Behind the scenes I remembered that the Aéroports de Paris HQ is somewhere in my quarter, but then I forgot about the 'question' until last Wednesday - when I spied a fellow wearing a jacket with a kind of yellow 'AdP' logo on it. He was walking along the avenue eating a good-looking sandwich.

I said, "Excusez-moi de vous déranger, monsieur, mais where have Roissy's rabbits gone?"

He stopped walking and stopped eating and looked me over to see if I appeared to be one of Paris' odder beggars or some other kind of Montrouge nutball.

Then he said, translated, "I don't work at Roissy, I work at Orly. There are billions of 'lapins' at both airports. Who told you there weren't any?"

"They've always been there and they're still there," he said.

I hope this answers the 'Antique Question of the Week.'

regards, ric


Down, Way Down, Way Way Down

Email from Elliott Medrich. Sent via the Internet on Wednesday, 5. December:-

All right. But let me tell you, as an observant runway watcher I know he is wrong. This guy gave you the typical French blow off - 'None of your business!'

The rabbit population is down, way down, way way down!

Better start checking the menus at hotel restaurants around Roissy. Someone, somewhere, is putting our furry friends to good use. See you in two weeks.

best

elliott


Personal Inspection

Bonjour Elliott -

I can understand your dissatisfaction with the 'official' answer even though I have no reason to suspect that Aéroports de Paris' personal are either blind or 'fobbing me off.'

Since I will be passing through Roissy a bit less than two weeks from now on my way to the Café Metropole Club's meeting in New York City, I will personally assess the rabbit situation at Roissy, which is the very airport you mention.

If my departure is on schedule, it will take place somewhat after dusk on one of the year's shorter days. If I do not see any rabbits illuminated by the plane's lights, and I do not see any of the rabbits' own famous flashlights, I will be willing to agree with you that the rabbits are possibly no longer there in great numbers.

This will only the leave the open question of, 'where have they gone?' If they have gone anywhere.

When you arrive, could you take the time to check some of those airport hotel menus?

regards, ric

Flashnews Update

Paris:- Monday, 10. December:- According to exclusive information supplied to this reporter by Dimitri Shipounoff of the Paris Gilders' Guild, the glue traditionally used for affixing gilding to Louis XIV picture framesphoto: dimitri the gilder is no longer available in France. This situation has thrown Paris gilders into a proper tizzy.

A European decree has banned the use of rabbits for making this special glue, because it hurts their feelings or something. Mr. Shipounoff said that the substitute glue is not only no good, but is probably made from 'mad-cow' leftovers. If you are in the habit of licking your gilding, this could prove to be a health hazard.

This photo of Dimitri Shipounoff proves this 'story' is not a fabrication, I think.

As a result of the non-use of rabbits to make this special glue - actually the best variety of it is made from hares - it seems unlikely that Roissy's rabbits have disappeared for the purposes of making gilder's glue. In fact, the opposite is probably true.
signature, regards, ric

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