BCSiF - 'Best Crêpe Stand in France'

From left, Heather Tammy and Karen. These club
'reports' need an audio portion!

'Acronym of the Week' Is a 'First' Too

Paris:- Thursday, 14. November 2002:- The problem with tomorrow's weather is that France-2 TV is on strike today. Instead of Isabelle parading back and forth against a 'blue-light' background of a weather-animated France, she appeared in a tiny little window at the bottom left of the TV screen.

She also appeared dressed for work, which she never does during regular broadcasts. The whole effect was somewhat sad. What there was of it, she said, beware of the storm warning foreseen for the Côte d'Azur, and some general rain for Paris.

Exceptionally, for Paris there will be no weather for the coming weekend. The next Azores Low - this is a new thing. I thought the Azores only had 'highs.' Anyway, it is sending us very low lows this November, but they are warm ones.

This might mean the weather will be safe for dancing in streets this weekend, if there is any weather. By 'warm,' Isabelle meant about 13 degrees. Rain is, well you know, wet H2O.

I forget what the weather forecast was for today. There was a storm last night after everybody was safely in bed. This caused problems for the ocean racers, doing the Route du Rhum, who are in the Atlantic off the northwest coast of Spain. Their multi-hulled speedboats are falling apart, but the single-hulled ones are getting through.

This afternoon, the sun is popping out and in from a mostly evil-looking sky. It does not occur to me to wear a hat. This is because I got up before eight this morning. This is the day for the bed I ordered four weeks ago.

The last spot of soap is just drying on the bedroom floor when the bedmen 'frappez fort' on my door. It took three hours to take everything out of there so the bed could fill up the room. There isn't going to be any dancing going on in there. Even turning around will be tricky.

Other stuff got washed this morning too. It's amazing how dirty lamps and cabinets can get in 18 years! Practically need a chisel to get the grit off.

I can't wait to try out this bed, which is about the first real bed I've ever bought in my life. Um, the first one that isn't lying directly on the floor or on some so-called adjustable springy things with steel frames. They were cheap steel!

The bedmen say it is guaranteed for five years. Besides its support, it is about as thick as three Banque de France bank vault doors. Only guaranteed five years?

I read the guarantee. It says, 'in order for the guarantee to be valuable, you must turn the mattress over head-to-foot every three days for the first two years.' Something, something, and this is supposed to flatten out 'the bumps.' What bumps? The one I test cat-napped on at the BHV didn't have any 'bumps.'

Well, it is Café Metropole Club time, not siesta time, so I cruise off to the métro and have an uneventful ride down to Châtelet. Châtelet, Rivoli, the Pont Neuf, and the Quai de Seine are uneventful too.

At the café La Corona the wind is clipping along from the east. Nobody is on either terrace. There are number of civilians in the 'grande salle' finishing their lunches. When they leave I think they are all going back to their hotel room beds, for a nice afternoon snooze. Lucky devils!

Before I can begin doodling curtain designs Mark Kritz arrives, dressed up a with a tie. He explains this by saying he had lunch with a 'professor.' He says he has come from the Christian Schad exhibition at the Musée Maillot. This is another famous German artist unknown in Paris. There is some special season for unknown famous German artists in Paris this fall.

I ask him if he is leaving and he says 'yes' so I get a photo. He was at last week's meeting too, but for such a short time he didn't get in the meeting's 'report.' He doesn't want to be in this one either, but he does sit still for a moment.

Then he exits stage-left and Karen Delaney from Rochester enters from stage-behind-the-bar. She is miffed when I ask her name. Karen is at club meetings about twice each year. Now I remember the after-club vernissage she went to with Dinny Moyer and Nigel White - um, a year ago, about.

Heather Stimmler-Hall, our fantastic club member number one arrives, not wearing her customary beanie hat. When I activate the camera she says, "Oh no, not again!"

Karen wraps her sweater over her head when I turn the camera her way. They talk about awkward characters they've had the misfortune to cross paths with in Cannes and Perpignan, without specifically mentioning the club's secretary.

Heather doesn't live in a caravan in Antibes anymore. She lives in a little house in Biot. When I pronounce it wrong even though I spell it right, she says I've said it just like all Parisians. The people in Biot pronounce it 'Bee-ott' just to fool people from here.

I think it is because Parisians calls the region PACA for short. It is sort of like the Panama of France, so 'PACA' kind of suits it. 'PACA' is an acronym for 'Provence-Côte d'Azur-Alps Maritime' or something, maybe with Rhône in it too. It is the only short name for anything in France, except 2CV or CDG. Orly is, well, four-lettered Orly.

As a new householder Heather has some interesting comments to make. Such as, "And then you learn a silly little radiator 'key' costs four euros!" These are essential for letting the air bubbles out of radiators and you have to buy new 'keys' every year. Because you always lose last year's.

Heather has a theory that cr&ecic;pes sold at street stands are a superior form of fastfood. "Cheese and mushroom are good," she says. This is how I learn that an aubergine is an eggplant.