...Continued from page 1

Tomoko Yokomitsu, the club's sole movie star - but not the club's only actor person - arrives with an apology for having a part last Thursday. When she orders a Schwepps instead of some BjN, she says, "Je suis désolé" for this too. I suggest both apologies are totally unnecessary, while wondering where my 16:00 double espresso has gotten to.

Gwen, astute club 'reports' reader, observes that the weather in Paris has been 'mostly sunny' since 1. November. It is - forecasts are - in club 'reports,' but I'm not going to re-read them. Tomoko says, "Very bad weather. I'm sorry for you."

Stephen starts to say something about the weather in Paris, but Marion cuts in and says their hotel room only has a windicle, at the bottom of a building winkle. "Instead of a regular window with light," she adds.

President George Bush is in London today trying to cheer up Prince Charles, so the geopolitical state of the United States is briefly discussed by two members and ignored by all others. Barry says, "I'm over here - let them have a revolution."

Some members helpfully point out that since the first one, all subsequent ones have been declared illegal. "Jefferson said there should be one every generation," Barry insists.

A couple of members give poor reviews to this year's window decorations of the 'Grands Magazins.' Marion says they are recycled from last year. Gwen is annoyed that the Louvre even has Christmas decorations for its museum shop.

Member Mark Kritz arrives, wearing a BjN straw boater. He says, after getting a glass full, "This BjN isphoto: lauren, beaujolais, waiter's boater very nice." Marion tells us why German drivers who intentionally build up 18 'nasty' points on their driver's licences, have to take psycho tests. She says they are 'psycho' if they drive like crazy maniacs.

Lauren does her best to reduce Europe's 'BjN lake.'

Although the meeting is out of control, we still manage to get several 'Group Photos of the Week,' including one of all readers. While Marion explains how she cannot let Stephen buy clothes by himself, Barry demonstrates how some monster he is telling us about, gets slammed on the forehead with a fatal chocolate bar.

"Like this," he says, "Splat!"

I declare the meeting over on account of silliness, and because it is 17:00. But before I do this, Lauren Camera-Murray arrives. She borrows Mark's boater in order to get the true BjN sensation. Steve Camera-Murray also arrives a bit later, but sits too far away for the club's secretary to record the latest news about his movie career.

Marion, in addition to making sure Stephen buys pants as long as his legs, says she is also buying birthday presents for next March. Obviously there must be something about shopping in Paris that is so important it can't wait for the 'Soldes d'Hiver.'

Before starting, I thought this would be a difficult 'report' to write because for the first time there were four periods of complete silence during the meeting. On account of the BjN, I don't think anybody else noticed them.

Club Members and Readers Like You

Both categories are now makingphoto: jolly club lights voluntary contributions of support for Metropole. Doing this will ensure that the magazine and the Café Metropole Club continue. Please take a look at the new 'Keep Metropole Flying' page and do what you can today.

The club's own chandlier festooned with BjN propaganda and phoney grapes.

Because club membership is free, as is its free membership card, the Café Metropole Club's ex-rules and various disallowed 'exceptions' forbid actual membership 'dues.' Consider both the magazine and the club to be forms of free software that can be supported with your 'shareware' contributions.

The 'Soldes d'Hiver' Alert

Contrary to my previous 'guesses,' the official version about the dates for the Soldes d'Hiver in Paris is now official. The start date has been given as Wednesday, 7. January, and the final day will be Saturday, 7. February, in 2004 of course. Max-up your plastic!

The 'About the Café Metropole Club' About Page

If this 'report' about today's club meeting seems ga-ga to you, you are probably not a lucky club member. Take a look at the 'About the Café Metropole Club' page if you are not sure what any of this is about. It will tell you no more than you need to know, if this much.

One other fact - they are very few and far between - is worth remembering. You can become a lifetime member of this online magazine's free, live, and real club by simply attending any of its meetings in Paris for free. There's no reason for knowing anything about the other 'fact.'

What, Who, When, Why Not, How, Where?

The weekly club meetings continue to start about 15:00 sharp on Thursdays and run on until about 17:00, in the European Time of Paris Zone - which is really 'CET' for short and not 'OGPL' - and elsewhere known as 3 pm to 5 pm. The only part of the world where these meetings happen in metrical times is Paris.

Doing anything at a meeting is tolerated because it is in Paris. True 'firsts' are welcome, with 'first' having a greater 'report' value than 'true.' Don't get the wrong idea - 'true' isgraphic: club location map fine too. This is a special no-purpose case rather than a regular club ex-'rule' or French-type 'exception.'

If you prefer to be 'not found' on the Internet, be sure let the club's secretary know before you become slightly notorious. If necessary you can even be at a meeting and not be at it officially. 'Rules' have ceased being and are still 'ex-rules.' All 'exceptions' to 'no rules' have been abolished. There was a brief period of mourning over these, but it was brief.

Talking in multiple languages at meetings is fine. Dancing may be permitted too. Sit wherever you like. Whatever you say may be honestly appreciated by the other members present, if they are listening, which they really do sometimes - and by all readers of this online magazine, if it happens to be written here, as some of it is, sometimes, depending on the 'notes' available, and not even all of these are used if they are in excess.*

*The above paragraphs are unchanged since last week because one out of every two members came with a digital camera, except Stephen, who had one with antique film in it.

The café's location is:

Café-Tabac La Corona
2. Rue de l'Amiral de Coligny - or - 30. Quai du Louvre
Paris 1. Métro: Louvre-Rivoli, Pont-Neuf or Châtelet.
Every Thursday from 15:00 to 17:00.

A bientôt à Paris
signature, regards, ric

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