I'm Outa Here

Après Moi, le Déluge

Paris:– Monday, 20. November:–  Remember that beautiful fall we had, with the warm days, gentle breezes, Champagne nights and the leaves hanging on the trees like they were married to them? Like, if you remember, please turn to page 9, stashed somewhere else on this Webpage.

Page 9, Right Here!

Why, it was as recently as Wednesday, or Friday, or Saturday. But Sunday was a touch cooler, maybe not over 10 degrees, and it rained a lot of Saturday night after I was in, in bed, snuggled under my fresh and warm wool blanket, the same color as my eyes used to be, in, you know, the good old days. Then the sun was shining yesterday, giving the leaves another one of its last flashes. But that was it. Finito!

According to tonight's – exceptionally the Sunday version – tonight's TV–weather news, all that good, retarded, stuff is at an end. It's over. Fall is finished. Weep if you must but say goodbye to it. This isn't just because this is exactly what I'm doing first thing Monday morning – Adios Boggleville! – but because the weather lady trotted out a set of maps for the coming week and they weren't pretty.

First off there is going to be some wind, all of 70 kph gusts from the southwest, headed for the northeast. Still kinda warm in other words. Then there's to be a great wall of clouds, lying along the wind direction, from Biscay to Luxembourg. It's the plumber says Sunday's Le Parisien,.

On Tuesday there might be tiny and ocasional peeps of sun poking through the murk above the diagonal, while below it the country will be socked in. The temperature is still expected to be 12 degrees. There might be the southwest wind too, but this was specifically mentioned as being a Wednesday feature. Divide France in half from top to bottom and color the western half gray. The right half won't be much better and in any case, Paris i`s on the line.

Gray, gray, gray is the story for Thursday. Okay, switch out one of those and flip rainy in its place. Drop the high temperature down two degrees to 10 and you'll have a good idea of the future. By this time the weather lady was saying all of this was no better than a probable 3 out of 5, so if you want to bet on sunshine the house odds are not too bad. But the house being the house, the odds aren't terrible rosy either.

This week I'm ahead of schedule so the Pommeland forecast hasn't arrived from Météo Jim yet. The past week in New York wasn't so terrible. What Jim wrote –

La Der Des Der?

Today, November 11, Armistice Day or Veterans Day as it is known in Pommeland and La der des der in Paris, the Rest of Paris which is France and Outre–France, also known as Europe, is being celebrated. The weather is smiling on the veterans. Today the parades and marchers have sunshine and temperatures in the upper 60s to near 70 a–grade. But by this time tomorrow rain and a possible Nor'easter will be visiting Pommeland with temperatures around 60 degrees a–grade.

A quick review of the week that was wet showed that 4 inches – 10 e–100ths-meters – of rain fell in the greater Pommeland area. The weather service is still issuing flash flood alerts for gutters, creeks, smaller streams and their tributaries.

As for the coming week, temperatures will stay around 60 but rain will arrive on Friday and bring cooler temperatures. It is mid–autumn, but the temperatures do not want to agree with the calendar.

Surprise Week–Old Monday Update!!!

Thanks to Metropole's prescient and all knowing gift of 20/20 hindsight, the following update is issued for Pommeland's weather.

The drenchies, the drips and drops, the spritzes and the rainy day feeling will continue off and on throughout the week until Friday when we will have more weather in the form of sun and cooler temperatures. Temperatures will creep up through the 60s until Friday.

The above message is true. If the facts change, disregard them because the truth is true and unchanging.

A la prochaine , Météo Jim

Watch this spot carefully for updates.

Café Life

I'm Outa Here

By the time you read this I might be 11,000 metres over the Atlantic and heading west. If you read this too soon I will still be here under that wool I mentioned but by the time you hit the sack I'll be airborne, in a flying sardine can not watching movies made for – who do they make those movies for?

But first I will get to Roissy, like a day ahead of time, in order to stand around a lot with a lot of other harmless folks while a cohort of the formerly jobless go through the motions of looking for terroristic types of items that all of us hapless travellers just happen to – no man! We won't, we don't. We are all brainwashed into believing that the person ahead of us in line is a dangerous dude.

Yeah, yeah, he's a wife–beater in real life. That lady there, she's wired to cold remedies. Every winter she goes on a bender. Better frisk her. She might be carrying a hardball made out of old kleenex. That kid over there, the one with the wires in his head – obviously one of a highschool gang that terrorizes Mr. Biggin's apple orchard. We are surrounded by dangerous characters. Yeah, instead of just being crammed into a dirty seat in a dirty plane for, for – how many hours is it?

I don't know about you but my Air France flight is only going to take two hours o cross the whole Atlantic. This is why I have to get to the airport 6 hours early. They sent me an email today that said I could print my ticket in the comfort of my own home. Used to, you bought a ticket, the airline printed it for you. Lousy ticket. Said I could punch it in myself and print out the boarding pass anyplace in the airport.

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