"That's What I Want!"

photo, fastfood, maison de gyros, rue huchette Fastfood in the Quartier Latin.

Metrical News and Thrills

by Ric Erickson

Paris:– Monday, 12. February:–  Blue skies are fleeting and kind of rare but the temperature is holding on to 10 degrees or more, so I should be the last to complain, even if I don't need to use my new gloves. Details below at the little weather corner –

The Little Weather Corner

Today's big surprise was provided by the TV–weather news. The young guy got a haircut because it seems like he is taking over from the two girls and the strange dude with the checkered suits, and it looks like he may have had something to do with the new maps. They should of had a warning – Attention! we are showing the weather with new maps!

It was all different. It was like in a different country. Luckily I have Le Parisien's maps as a backup, even if their weather is 18 hours older. First off, according to the radar there was a lot of rain sweeping across France today. Maybe it was a little rain contained in a lot of sweeps.

For tomorrow, Tuesday, we start with one sweep, from north to south, just to the west of here. During the day, at two minutes past noon – or midday, which isn't the same thing – the sweep sweeps through here, plus everyplace north and south. With the new maps I am not sure if the sweep is good news of bad news. I thought the orange part was the bad part because of the Orange Alerts.

photo, metro sign, daguerreto the métro and ride.

At least Wednesday is simple. There is to be a southwest wind and everything else will be crummy. On Thursday, the whole northwest including this here part, will be the opposite of orange, and he said orange will be nice. Not here then, but south of the Loire. At least it seems clear now that orange on the map is good news. Temperatures should be 11, 10 and 12 in the order, respectively. I'll get the hang of this, soon so long as we don't have any Orange Alerts.

From the other side of the Atlantic sportsnews is getting active again but we expected as much after the Stuporbowl. We switch our arms, shoot our cuffs and turn to Météo Jim, with the latest... sports?.

Esperanza Con Leche

Even as we speak – or write – the catchers and pitchers for the Yankees start their spring training this Tuesday in Florida as the Boys of Summer begin their rituals and the failed hopes of last year will be revived anew.

A review of the weather is now in order. As Mee–a–mee was drenched in rain last Sunday, a super frigid arctic cold wave came to visit from the Midwest where temperatures reached minus 42 a–grad. No conversions to euro–grad are possible because the EU declared anything below minus 40 to be the same temperature for a–grad and euro–grad. This is the only point at which the two temperature scales agree. As un–European, capitalistic, having no socialist tendencies and only two innate ideas and Anglo Saxon inspired, Pommeland didn't experience these temperatures, but Monday saw a dusting of snow and highs in the low to mid–teens a–grad. Skies were a beautiful blue along with wind chills below 0 a–grad. In the meantime, parts of New York State, aka extreme northwestern Pommeland, have been buried under 8 feet – almost 3 euro maxi–kilos of snow. The Groundhog will send replacement S******* coffeeshops.

Tuesday will be a clash of the Groundhog and the Boys of Summer. Depending on the track that the storm takes, a major snow storm could develop Tuesday afternoon into Wednesday morning. Predictions range from two snow flakes to 6 inches or more. Temperatures for the rest of the week will be in the low to mid 30s a–grad. See page 39 in section F for Celsius.

toon, citroen 2cvRétromobile starts Friday.

A la prochaine , Météo Jim

Café Life

"That's What I Want!"

We were at it again. Regardless of what I wrote here last week Josef Schomburg and I were not fighting over pixels. He threw the switch on the whole shebang last Thursday and it all came together like a potful of honey and then we both collapsed, gasping like fish drunk on high–proof water. All that's left are a few untidy ends that we weren't working on anyway – such as some readers' Explorer browser not printing endless pages.

photo, notre dame, sunday The ever–changing sky.

I was so thrilled that I immediately went out and re–upped with Wanadoo which now seems to be called Orange – which, alert readers will recall, refers to heavy weather warnings. Or if we are going by the new France–2 TV–weather maps, orange means good weather, usually south of the Loire. But I digress.

Let me just say that all major ISPs here are now offering access to TV and unlimited phoning with DSL for the same price as DSL alone. I never phone anybody unlimited but I am interested in the TV, especially for getting the weather. My reception is very poor so if the TV works via the DSL it will be an improvement. There is also a broadcast process here called TNT, which is more free channels with better sound and images, and in theory I can now get these.

So Wanadoo–Orange–France Télécom gave me a DSL modem to replace their older DSL modem, and a decoder for the TV. I shelled out 24€ for a phone to hook up to the modem. Heck, it even almost looks like a portable phone.

The two modems look nearly identical. It should have been a straight swap. All settings and numbers stayed the same, except for the WiFi security code, and this was placed all over, easy to cut–and–paste. Thus it came as no surprise to get the following message for 30 hours – "You are not connected to the Internet."

photo, bike chained to fence, notre dame

Which reminded me of the first time I set up the Wanadoo DSL modem. In fact, remembering that helped a lot. After 30 hours of fooling around with the perfectly good settings I decided to try the unlikely one, and the thing immediately leaped into life. Should I worry, I wonder, about the message that now pops onscreen – "Are you really sure you want to be online all the time?"

Another new feature is that the spam filters have forgotten their blacklist. Meanwhile the spammers are sending me fake messages from Wanadoo, telling me to open an attachment full of viruses and other bugs. Am I sure I want to be online all the time?

But all of this was ahead me on Friday when I came away from Orange or some place with two shopping bags full of nearly free goodies. I was so excited about setting up a DSL modem again that I took myself to the café Le Bouquet for a cocktail with the Daguerréotypes, returned to the scene after their extensive voyages.

It was loud. It reminded me of the old days, rather of shout–night. The peanuts were good, if tardy, and the café cost no more than at the club's café. The two Ds said, "Don't take my picture." The light was bad. It was loud. The street outside glistened in the rain. The little pots of wine became empty quickly. The rain became more serious. It was loud, just like it used to be.

photo, poster, red hot chili peppers, metro stationGrammy winners coming here.

Not actually continued... not here, not ever.

On Thursday the Café Metropole Club Meets

The last meeting on Thursday with one member present, not new. Many other members, old and new, remained absent, more or less as unexpected. This week on Thursday there will be yet another Café Metropole Club meeting. Unless I am mistaken it will be happening on France's 15th day of partial no smoking, weather permitting.

The next meeting of the Café Metropole Club will be on 15. February. The Saint of the Day next Thursday is another somewhat obscure one who was a missionary. Please welcome Saint–Claude de la Colombière, born in 1641 into a noble family of Saint–Symphorien–d'Ozon, between Lyon and Vienne. On this date in 1682 he died at Paray–le–Monial but you needn't note the names.

photo, sign, grande salle

More mundane, all about the club and its lame legends are on the page routinely called the About the Club Webpage. Some readers who have a little notion of English won't lack a grasp of the few facts and some astonishing fables, and should not fail to view-the club's out–zoned hand–turned membership card before its renewal, pending now for the last 114 weeks.

photo, sign, rue du cloitre notre dame

This Was Metropole Ten Years Ago

Other Internet magazines that claim to have been online for 11 years are fibbing, most of them. If you are annoyed to read this once again keep your hat on because some important news is coming to this spot very soon, like maybe, next week.

Café Life Légère 90.6

Pay Attention

The Quote of the Week is just as boring this week as last, a situation lasting for quite some time now. "Allow the President to invade a neighboring nation whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion, and you allow him to do so whenever he may choose to say he deems it necessary for such purpose, and you allow him to make war at pleasure." With this let us wish Abraham Lincoln happy birthday today and thank him for this quote from 1848.

photo, sign, perdu chat

The Wobble–W Snuff Corner

There are a mere 322 days left of this year, the same number that 1771 had when Adolf Fredrik , the KIng of Sweden, ate himself to death. After 20 dreary years as king, Adolf Fredrik decided to have a light snack consisting of lobster, caviar, sour cabbage, smoked herring and Champagne. All would have been well had he not added 14 helpings of dessert, his favorite, semla served in bowls of hot milk. This was far richer than oatmeal and he remains fondly remembered by schoolchildren. Another pastime, his second favorite, was making snuff boxes.

Bourgeois Pataphysics

This is totally unconnected to the fact that this year has used up 42 days, the same number that 1894 had when an anarchist named Emile Henry tossed a bomb into the busy café Terminus in the Gare Saint–Lazare, resulting in the death of one bourgeois and injuring 20 others. Little Emile was only 22 years old at the time and was considered young to be a bomb–tossing anarchist. In fact his father was a middle–class ex–Communard who had been exiled for a time, and his brother was an anarchist too. When asked at his trial to explain why he had blown up the voyagers at Saint–Lazare, he said, "There are no innocent bourgeois." Emile himself died suddenly on 21. May 1894.

photo, sign, parking velos

Metric Knots Resolved

If it were not for Metropole to remind you of 1973 and Ohio's decision to post SI units you might actually overlook this historic day. However this state was the first to use the internationally recognized units – such as metre, kilogram, second, ampere, Kelvin, mole and candela, without spelling them exactly the same, or Canadian–style. The exceptions to the metric life are the nautical mile and knot, used for measuring speed and distance for ships and aircraft. A nautical mile equals 1852 metres, or 1 minute of latitude, both useful to know in Ohio.

The Ex–Question of Schleswig–Holstein

Many folks might be unaware that today is the anniversary of Georges Simenon who was born in 1903. The author, who died in 1989, was nothing if not busy during his life. He produced 192 novels, hundreds of stories, several autobiographies and many articles under his own name and another 176 novels, dozens of short stories, fables and articles under 27 pseudonymes. Among the total, 103 stories featuring Maigrat the detective, in 75 novels and 28 stories. Belgium has a right to cheer its hero.

A bientôt à Paris
signature, regards, ric

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