...Continued from page 1

He also tells me that there are two kinds of Guinness now. While I'm thinking, sure, there's Murphy's, there's - he explains that Guinness has gone 'modern' with a beverage called 'Extra Cold.' It is kept at 3.5 degrees instead of the regular six degrees.

Besides being far too cold to be real Guinness, its other advantage is supposed to be that it's faster to pour a jar of it. Golly! I think. Ireland must be really on the skids if nobody has time to wait for a proper jar of stout. Next thing you know they'll probably toasting their cheese sandwiches.

Joe starts to say you have to be careful trying to tell jokes in France, when Ron says he got his credit card stuck in an ATM at Gare du Nord. A bit of it was sticking out and he tried to find somebody who could help him get it out.

Everybody he talked to said somebody else was responsible for it. Finally he found some idle cops who looked at it and then pushed it all the way in. This is not one of Joe's jokes - Ron has to go back there today because swallowed cards only get coughed up 24 hours later.

About here we find out Joe was a fighter pilot. He started out on the first jet fighters and worked his way up to F-5's, and avoided ever having to fly a F-104. He said they had a high landing speed and weren't suitable for successful landings in Germany in the winter, even if the pilot wasn't trying to land in a fog at Tempelhof in Berlin.

At this meeting there are just the three of us, so there is little sensible talk about Paris. I tell Joephoto: ron bristol about the air museum out at Le Bourget - there's a lot of fighters out there plus the 001 Concorde. Ron says the tail of one just fell off a BA flight to New York, but this wasn't noticed particularly until it landed with part of it missing at JFK.

Ron says that Austin in Texas is not quite like other places in Texas, and everybody knows no other places are like Texas.

This reminds him that the word 'parallel' comes from the cable-car thing in Barcelona. The club's secretary would really like a 'Something of the Week' to wrap this up, so on the suspicion that Ron is not a pure Austin, Texas native - the only town outside of Rio where topless at Mardi Gras is legal, he says - oh, Ron does boost his adopted Austin.

So folks, here it is - Ron's hometown is like Cashel in Ireland. Halfway between Cleveland and Toledo in Ohio, you'll find Sandusky - hereafter to be known as the 'City of the Week' for the duration of this week.

The Next Usual Club Meeting

The next meeting of the Café Metropole Club will be on Thursday, 12. December, which is probably fairly unremarkable. Otherwise, the Sainte's Day next Thursday is Jeanne-Françoise de Chantal. I know nothing about this sainte except that she may have the longest saint's name of all. I haven't checked all of the other 1348 saint's names.

The 'About the Café Metropole Club' Page

Take a look at the 'About the Café Metropole Club' page to learn how to become a member. Even if you are reading this 'report' about today's club meeting, all you need to know about how to become a member is to be here.

So ignore this 'About' page if you wish - even though it was written just for you. All you need know is that you can become a member of this online magazine's live, free and real club by simply being at a meeting. If this seems like needless repetition, reading it twice has proved to be harmless in real clinical tests by actors dressed as dentists.

Endless Christmas Season Note Repeat

Major Paris department stores turned on their lights some weeks ago and lifted their display window curtains on their decorated windows. Many displays will continue until the first weekend in January. Staying open on Sundays starts on 8. December, which is a Sunday. The Soldes d'Hiver start shortly after New Year, so they will be in 2003.

Where, Why Not, How, What, When, Who?

Club meetings begin in Paris beginning at 15:00 on Thursday and continue until 17:00, in Europe's Centralphoto: patrick European Time Zone - which is 'CET' for short and not 'EMIT' - and known elsewhere as 3 pm to 5 pm in other worldwide areas. This is regardless of 'winter time' which is currently prevailing here.

Patrick scans horizon for sight of new club members, without luck.

Come with your own new 'Quote of the Week' or propose your hometown as 'City of the Week' or invent any other 'Things of the Week.' New true 'firsts' will be welcome too, with 'first' being more necessary than 'true.' 'No-names' is an option you can also opt for if you prefer to be 'not found' on the Internet. 'No rules' has ceased to be an 'exception' and would not even be an exceptional 'rule' even if these had not ceased, which is what they've done.

What you have to say may be honestly appreciated by the other members present, if there are any, and if they are listening - and by all readers of this online magazine, if they read this - if it should happen to be written here, as some of it sometimes is. Don't bother reading the parts that have been left out.

The café's location is:

Café-Tabac La Corona
2. Rue de l'Amiral de Coligny - or - 30. Quai du Louvre
Paris 1. Métro: Louvre-Rivoli, Pont-Neuf or Châtelet.
Every Thursday from 15:00 to 17:00.

A bientôt à Paris
signature, regards, ric

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