...Continued from page 1

I'm giving up on this meeting 'report.' Quite early on the club's mascot, a sparrow named Sam, flew in to check the baguette-crumb situation and I have only absent-mindedly added this vital bit of club news to the end of the day's notes.

Finally, at 17:30, after all ten present members have disappeared in seven different directions, I amphoto: half ham sandwich, club food of the week standing on the café's terrace thinking about the climate in the métro, when club member number one, Heather Stimmler-Hall, says, "I thought the meetings went on until six."

Documentary evidence of the 'Food of the Week.'

So we go over to the Samaritaine building that has been turned into a five-floor Kenzo paradise sandwiched between a below street-level sushi bar and a bar-restaurant on the top floors named 'Kong.'

This sleek and ultra-modern place has been open two weeks. Heather scans the menu and says it has very reasonable prices. But when I ask to take a photo, a manager-type says the place needs no publicity because they only want chic Parisians to come and make the place fashionable for six weeks, before settling into the routine of catering to ordinary folks - who come to Paris instead of various 'redneck rivieras.'

I can take a hint. I'm not going to give this 'Kong' place any free publicity - not when the Samaritaine's open-air rooftop terrace is right next door.

The 'Hat Story of the Week'

This is not actually about hats, but about some real events after the club meeting and the 'Kong' business. The first happened in the Rue Emile Richard, the road that slices through the Montparnasse cemetery.

I was walking along idly wondering why cars were parked on the sidewalks of this street with no buildings, when an approaching old man stopped when we were abreast, to complain about the parked cars on the sidewalks.

The conversation wandered off to his great great-grandparents and his great-grandparents who are buried in the Saint-Vincent cemetery on Montmartre. His parents are safely stowed in the Montrouge cemetery. He said the Montparnasse cemetery, on either side of us, was only for famous folks with influence.

Himself, if he was lucky, would be planted in the one in Montrouge. Slightly less good would be Bagneaux, but still acceptable.

In parting, I suggested he should give the parked cars' rearview mirrors a passing whack. He saidphoto: interior, whole group, minis one he'd done that as a kid on Montmartre. I said I thought he could take the kid stuff up again. At 85, what does he have to lose?

Extremely rare interior photo of ten 'Members of the Week' in one photo.

Then I ran into my ex-landlady in the Rue Daguerre. She complimented me on picking a place to live that overlooks the cemetery. She said the renovations in my old apartment are going ahead but slowly. When it is finished she wants me to come by to assist with the 'arrosé.'

This is a kind of vernissage. Instead of getting 'varnished,' you sprinkle the new apartment with rosé wine. When I went by there the other day, painters had painted it all white again, like it was when I lived there.

In my own building a lady coming out of the elevator asked me to hold its door open. She fished around in the post trash bin and got a bit of cardboard and wedged it into a crack inside the elevator. She said it would prevent the elevator doors from sticking shut, and trapping users inside.

When I rode up to my floor I didn't take my eyes off this flimsy but essential piece of elevator equipment until the safety doors opened at my floor.

Inside my apartment, as I put my work sack down on the table, its strap fell off. The metal strap fastener had unbolted itself. Part of the metal either expanded or shrank. In the bathroom to wash my hands, the toiletpaper roll suddenly leaped off the faucet it hangs on, and scored a perfect ringer on the upright handle of the toilet brush.

There is something crazy about this weather here.

About the 'Café Metropole Club' About Page

Being a member of this club is pretty low-stress, despite all the talk about climate. If you care to read the 'About the Café Metropole Club' page itphoto: two wines of the week will tell you a bit about the club and how informal it pretends to be. Being free and having sparrows as mascots are its other plus-points. If better information is your goal, I suggest that you think twice about joining this club.

But wait! Not all members are 'hydraulics.'

You can give this 'About' page a pass if its exceedingly needless details are tiresome. Knowing more than the one fact that you can become a lifetime member of this online magazine's live, free and real club by being at any one or more of its meetings in Paris, yourself, is next-to-useless.

How, Who, When, What, Why Not, Where?

Club meetings begin - contrary to Paris usual 'exceptions' - about 15:00 on Thursdays and continue until 17:00, in Europe's only Zone of Kong Time - which is really 'CET' for short and not 'ZKT' - and elsewhere known as 3 pm to 5 pm in unhip areas of the planet, even though club meetings are nearly exclusively only held in the Paris part of it.

Bringing a 'Quote of the Week' or concocting any other 'Things of the Week' are not 'rules' to be obeyed. True 'firsts' are more than welcome too, with 'first' scoring far higher than 'true' if they are not untrue. This is a general rule rather than a club ex-'rule' or informal 'exception.'

If you prefer to be 'not found' on the Internet, or 'opted-out-opted,' please tell the club's secretary before hegraphic: club location map makes you mildly famous. 'No rules' have ceased being an 'exception' or a 'rule' a long time ago. There are some other 'exceptions,' but really, none worth mentioning much.

Talking at meetings is okay. Whatever you say will be honestly appreciated by the other members present if they are listening, which they really do sometimes - even when listening - and by all readers of this online magazine, if it should happen to be written here, as some of it is, sometimes.*

*The above paragraph is unchanged since last week on account of some of the items in this week's 'Hat Story' being extremely unlikely even if they happened for real today.

The café's location is:

Café-Tabac La Corona
2. Rue de l'Amiral de Coligny - or - 30. Quai du Louvre
Paris 1. Métro: Louvre-Rivoli, Pont-Neuf or Châtelet.
Every Thursday from 15:00 to 17:00.

A bientôt à Paris
signature, regards, ric

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