...Continued from page 1

"Women over 50 kilos are not allowed to shop in that store," Marion sniffs. Heather says she is too big too, but couldn't resist '50 percent–off' and hopes what she got fits.

Larry wants to know why Paris department stores are so hot. "They must be 30 to 35 degrees," he says. Actually he says fahrenheit temperatures, which are astronomical, so I have divided them by 22–sevenths and subtracted 32. Or is this the formula for leap–years?

As usual there is a new 'Waiter of the Week,' but the three members are not in a great mood of consumption. For the firstphoto: willy bird and friend time in quite a while Willy the Bird flies into the café's 'grande salle' and brings some friends with him. Maybe one is his girlfriend.

The sparrows do not give much more than a peek at the crumb situation in the club's area before flying all the way back through the café and out the front door. They could have flown out the side door which is wide open.

Here is Willy! Could that be Mrs. Willy?

After more talk about how Germans near the frontiers shop for gas in Luxembourg and French stuff in hypermarchés like Carrefour – or do they buy gas at the hypermarchés and get French cheeses in Luxembourg? Not many people in Paris are aware of all the cheap fun people living near the borders have.

Marion also puts in a plug for learning French at the Sorbonne. The only drawback, she says, is that the course is two–thirds 'French civilization' and it is not easy memorizing the names of all the kings from Clovis to 1870.

I think she says she has failed to remember the kings part three times, but I may have misheard her on account of all the 'Smart' cars going by on the Quai du Louvre that I point out to Larry too late for him to see.

Even though this is a meeting without a 'City of the Week' or a 'Drink of the Week' or anything else 'of the week' except maybe 'shopping,' we continue on past 17:00. It is quiet in the café, compared to the rush–hour chaos outside. It is warm and comfortable too.

Contest Deadline Nears

Don't wait to send in your entries for the fabulous Bumper–sticker Slogan Contest that is running jointly in Heather's Secrets of Paris newsletter and in Metropole.

To enter you should submit very short slogans that sum up Paris and France positively in a few clevertoon: 2cv with bumper sticker words that will fit on a bumper–sticker. The deadline for entries is Thursday, 22. April, one week from today.

There will be a suitably 'grand' prize for the best slogan, and nine runner–up prizes for the next best ones. The promised 'grand prize' is being somewhat elusive, so Heather and I have just as 'suitable' – and just as good – fallback prizes planned.

The judging of the entries will be held at the club meeting on Thursday, 29. April. All members who are present will be asked to assist with choosing the winners. You can find the few details about the contest on the aptly– named Contest page.

The Café Metropole Club's About Page

This short 'report' about today's club's meeting should give you a hint of the casual times to be had at some club meetings. The 'About the Café Metropole Club' page has all the additional information you need to know about joining. Luckily, it is practically nothing.

Become a real lifetime member of this online magazine's real, live and free club by becoming a member in seconds by attending any of its meetings in Paris, for free. There are no hidden costs, or 'rules.' What 'rules' there were, were abolished by the club's members long ago.

Who, What, When, How, Where, Why Not?

The weekly Thursday club meetings start around 15:00, on days that have Thursday afternoons. Meetings continue until about 17:00, in the European Time of Paris' annual 'semi–real spring' – which is really 'CET' for short and not 'les temps douces de avril' although they are sometimes – and known elsewhere as 3 pm to 5 pm. Paris is where all club meetings are held.

Doing anything at a meeting – like being at one – is considered the opposite of not being at one. True 'firsts' are welcome, with 'first' having a slightly greater 'report' value over 'true.' Actually 'true' is acceptable too, especially if it's remotely plausible and is impervious to lawsuits.

One note of caution – you may have any one of a hundred personal reasons for not wanting to be traceable viagraphic: club location map the Web. If so, be sure to inform the club's secretary that you prefer to be '404 – not found' by Web search engines before becoming 'found' in a club report.

Former 'rules' are 'former' and have been eliminated from the club's chronicles except for all the latter ones still online buried deep in the archives, which you can read if you are at loose ends. All 'exceptions' to any other 'rules' have been suspended forever, quite a bit like all the 'rules' except one.

Saying stuff at meetings is fine. If there's an empty chair sit – optional – wherever you like, or haul one over from another part of the café. If they are listening, whatever you say may be honestly appreciated by other club members present, and there usually are some – and if it should chance to be written here, as some of it is occasionally.*

*The above paragraphs are unchanged since last week because club members don't care what Communists think about 'shopping.'

The café's location is:

Café–Tabac La Corona
2. Rue de l'Amiral de Coligny – or – 30. Quai du Louvre
Paris 1. Métro: Louvre–Rivoli, Pont–Neuf or Châtelet.
Every Thursday from 15:00 to 17:00.

A bientôt à Paris
signature, regards, ric

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